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In a long-term relationship, passionate love typically simmers down to compassionate love within one to two years. People who are in compassionate love still feel passionate about one another, but the intensity typically feels less overwhelming and urgent.

This type of love involves caring deeply for the other person, truly knowing the other individual, and is committed to the other person through both good times and bad.

Even when disagreements take place, people who share compassionate love remain in love and dedicated to one another.

Some of the key cognitive, emotional, and behavioral characteristics of compassionate companionate love include:. So what determines whether people end up in passionate or compassionate love?

According to Hatfield, some of the factors associated with passionate love include:. One important thing to remember about these two types of love is that passionate love is usually briefer, while compassionate love may be more likely to stand the test of time.

Passionate love is intense, but it is generally very fleeting. Researchers have looked at how relationships progress among new couples, newlyweds, and those married for a longer time and found that while passionate love is more intense at the beginning of relationships, it tends to give way to compassionate love that is focused on intimacy and commitment.

Researchers have long suggested that passionate love tends to be the more likely type of love to fade. Interestingly, more recent research by Hatfield and her colleagues has suggested that time can have an equally detrimental effect on both passionate and companionate love.

One study comparing passionate and companionate love between newlyweds and long-term marriages also found that both newlywed men and women tended to feel equal levels of passion.

However, the researchers also found that newlywed women were more likely to love their partner compassionately at a greater level than their partner expressed in return.

Respondents are asked to think about the object of their affections, and then answer questions similar to the following:.

If you can answer yes to some or most of these questions, then it is probably a sign that what you are experiencing is passionate love. While it is one thing to understand what these two types of love are conceptually, how might these concepts play out in your real-world relationships?

In reality, you may be more likely to experience passionate love in those early stages of a new relationship. As your infatuation grows, your passion for the other person may build and eventually peak.

Companionate love may not necessarily be marked by wild passion, excitement, or obsessive thoughts that are seen in passionate love. However, this compassionate form of love does include feelings of tenderness, a strong bond, friendship, and enjoyment of the other's company.

Once you have established a more compassionate form of love, this does not mean that you will not experience great passion from time to time.

In fact, some research suggests that romantic love marked by intensity, engagement, and sexual interest but without the obsessive component that is often common in early stages of relationships is associated with higher self-esteem , increased well-being, and improve marital satisfaction.

Research suggests that the strongest and most lasting relationships may be those in which people are able to find a balance between companionate and passionate love.

So, what can you do to rekindle feelings of romantic love, even if you are in a long-term relationship where it feels like the flames of passion have long faded?

Look for ways to get out of your rut. Spend time together doing new things or seeking new adventures. Taking a dance or cooking class together, going on a trip to a new location, or even seeking adventures together in the outdoors are all ways to foster trust, intimacy, and even romantic passion.

During the s, U. Senator William Proxmire railed against researchers who were studying love and derided the work as a waste of taxpayer dollars.

Others defended Hatfield's and other researchers' important work, noting that if psychologists could understand patterns of human love, then perhaps they could also understand divorce and failed relationships.

Despite the debate, the work created by Hatfield and her colleagues contributed tremendously to our understanding of love and inspired further research on attraction, attachment , and interpersonal relationships.

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